Knees

It was not possible to write first thing in the morning.  Something about the universal energy prevented the words from coming in early today.  There is so much happening in the way of unimaginable losses to violence in communities across the state and country.  All of the activity that is triggered in such times, is helpful to relieve the pressure that builds out of anxiety, fear, anger, frustration, a feeling of helplessness.

In such times, there are no words that can be uttered when lives are lost as a result of individual and institutional insanity.  That is how it feels - as though sanity has been left behind.  

In countries that are engaged in war across the globe, the entire nation can get caught up in the name of patriotism, of protecting "our" way of life, of following the mandate of a higher order ritualized as gods that go by one name or another. The difficulty is in absorbing all of it and locating the direction that will lead out of the chaos.  Like a form of energy conversion that needs to be let go into the stratosphere - far from where humans live.

Elders who kill out of frustration/isolation, public servants who use their power and authority to attack rather than to protect, immigrants struggling to the point of no return, and intra-racial incidents that break the notion of "us" and "them" identities.  It becomes more clear - it's all "us", no "them.".  We are all suffering from amnesia and losing sight of the goal in life:  to become the best human being one can be in this lifetime.  To remember to express care, joy, and compassion.

In these times, the direction toward stability is not at all clear.  If one talks of peace, it feels irrelevant, insincere, useless in the aftermath of violence that takes the lives of everyday people at work on at social events.  If one pushes for policy change, the process requires a sustained level of attention and energy to alter realities via shifting policy - but it has to happen.  The vigils, protests, demonstrations can serve as an effective means for releasing the broader tensions among community members who have held on to patience with the changes that need to take place.  All of it needs to happen and where to put one's energy is a question – and that question is being "asked" more and more these days.

At some point, we are brought down to our knees.  It's more than reason or logic can manage.  It's beyond what any person's heart can take.  It's too deep for understanding to be reached by way of dialogue and discussion.  Yet, it remains that finding ways to engage with one another;  and resisting the desire to ignore or stand apart from what is happening cannot be the way.  There is something about the physical act of dropping to one's knees.

That move, the position, the effect on the body - expresses a moment of recognition that one has to pray, give way to submitting to a reality that is not going to change without follow up actions.  It is another natural way to get through the challenge of living in today's challenges.

Down on our knees.